Saturday, October 09, 2004

letter to the school

This was my last letter to the World Wise school before I was med-evac'd - it actually should have gone before my last post, but.... o, well.

This is a bit later going out than I would wish - my apologies, though I must say life has been a bit more interesting of late than I care for. I'm going to offer that as my excuse and leave the subject, go on to describing my reality for your amusement and edification.

So, I'm still here waiting to hear what's coming next for me - after several months of back pain, I had a MRI (Magnetic Resonance Image) September 28th. It was kind of fascinating, and quite painless, but the results were dismal. Apparently I have three herniated discs in my lower back, one of which is impinging on nerve function and causing the pain. The short story is that it's pretty likely I'll need to be evacuated to the States for surgery - the Peace Corps doctor gave me a 98% chance of it, but we need to wait for word from Washington. Which is what I'm doing. The films from my MRI were sent off to D.C. for evaluation there, but they took a bit longer to get there than expected. The doctors there will look at them, make a decision, and then tell the Peace Corps office here. Peace Corps will then call me and let me know - until then, I'm in Limbo. It's a bit nerve wracking, but all these petty personal problems do tend to distract me from the larger world news, and right now that may be all for the best.

If they decide to evacuate me, I'll be flown to Washington, have surgery, and if I can heal to Peace Corps satisfaction in 45 days I'll get to come back. If not, I'll be separated from the Peace Corps, and I won't see Armenia again for quite some time. If ever. It's a vastly depressing thought for me - I really love this country, and the community I have found here; I want to work here, and, after a year here, I'm at a point where I should be able to start some successful projects. I have a bit more language, I have community contacts, and I have a bit better understanding of how things work (or don't) around here - I was hoping to extend for an extra year, and now I may be leaving for good in a few weeks. There's just so much more I wanted to do here.

Not knowing for sure yet makes it all that much harder. I can't start any new projects; I've been working to tie up the last loose ends on all my ongoing work, or at least leave enough information for the new volunteer so that she can finish them off. I took a trip out to the Akner school the other day to see how the computers were working out for them. That was a rude awakening - the computers were there, which was good, but they haven't been set up yet, and no one is using them. They're just sitting in boxes in the principal's office, the teacher that was going to teach the computer classes has emigrated to Israel, and the principal hasn't even bought a surge protector for them yet. I offered to help setting them up and am willing to donate an extra surge protector I have to the cause; we found another woman who can teach - but it's going to take several more visits before anything happens. It may involve more time and effort than I have left here, so I'll pass it off to Tiffany and hope she can follow up on it for me.

I feel that I have to plan for not coming back, even as I hope that I'll be able to. I brought my cat into Yerevan last week for her shots and 'kitty passport' - six hours on marchutneys with a cat and you know it's serious; I've started giving some stuff away; I've been sorting my things into rough categories - what will stay, what will go, who is to get what; I've boxed up some stuff to ship home. I'm collecting addresses and phone numbers. The karate school awarded me a honorary black belt third dan, and presented me with yet another ring, this one with the school's insignia on it. It all feels so final. They also made me haash, a traditional Armenian dish made from cow feet, stomach, and tongue all stewed together. I can't say it's on my list of best meals I've ever eaten but it's a long way from the worst as well, and anytime an Armenian man spends 6 days preparing a single meal for me, I'm going to eat it. I'm sure it's very healthy.

Here's a little side note on reality: one of the things I gave away was two 3 ring binders filled with the usual lined paper. I gave them to Roman, Nellie's fifteen year old brother - and he was delighted to get them, told me it was a very good present indeed. I can't imagine any fifteen year old in America being delighted with such a gift, but he honestly was - such an ordinary thing, such a small present, and he was most pleased. Something to remember. This still amazes and delights me, BTW

I'm apologize for the relentless self interest of this letter - as I said, my petty little problems have been distracting me from the world at large of late, and are likely to be doing so for quite some time. I'd say at least 45 days - but I'll send out an email when I know for sure. Until then, wish me luck, and I send you my love.


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